“We have the power to hold no opinion about a thing and to not let it upset our state of mind-for things have no natural power to shape our judgments.”
-Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, 6.52
That was such a powerful excerpt from Meditations. Really take some time and process it for a minute.
You can make yourself miserable or you can make yourself unstoppable.
If you presume someone is saying something negative about you behind your back, the only reason it is upsetting is due to the power you give it. You gave something originally powerless the ability to deter you.
Here is an excerpt out of The Daily Stoic to really solidify the point:
“In other words, it is possible to hold no opinion about a negative thing. You just need to cultivate that power instead of wielding it accidently. Especially when having an opinion is likely to make us more aggravated.”
There is so much information to consume and have thoughts on, why waste your energy on those that will have a negative impact on you. This is not to say don’t face hard truths or dive deep into areas that stand on shaking moral grounds. Things are obviously going to upset you. But practicing not paying mind to things that will have zero impact on you really negatively or positively and may ultimately upset you is a strong and effective habit to get into.